Same story BUT different names – thousands of kiwi parents are going through the same –

Hit 👍if you agree and leave a comment, if you have been through the same process or maybe worse ? .. Let your voice be heard ….

Taranaki father’s mental health strain following Family Court case

Deena Coster11:23, May 30 2019

A man who was taken to the Family Court by his ex-partner suffered a mental breakdown as a result of the stress. (File Photo)

A man who was taken to the Family Court by his ex-partner suffered a mental breakdown as a result of the stress. (File Photo)

A Taranaki father said he suffered a mental breakdown due to the stress he experienced during a recent Family Court battle with his ex.

And in the aftermath, he is calling for more scrutiny on how the court operates along with a more stringent test of the evidence put before it.

His case before the Family Court is now over but it dragged on for 17 months, sparked off by allegations from his former partner that he was physically abusive, claims he flatly denied.

Stuff has decided to not name the man in order to protect the identity and privacy of his children.

In 2017, a protection order was granted against him after a ‘without notice’ application was made by his estranged partner. This type of application is treated urgently by the court.

Once the interim order was made, his three children attended an anti-violence education programme which he said he was given no say over or any information about.

The man intended to defend the making of a permanent order but his ex-partner decided to discontinue her application related to her and the children, bringing the matter to an abrupt end.

He said it “kind of sucks” that he did not get his day in court as he never had a chance to defend the allegations made against him.

The personal cost to him had been significant, he said.

Along with the $30,000 he spent on legal bills, he suffered emotionally as well.

He said he had no initial help or support through the process.

“You’re pretty much on your own.”

As a result of the compounding stress, he had a mental breakdown.

“I just wasn’t functioning, it was too much to comprehend.

“It was just massively stressful.”

He was one of the 500 people who made submissions to the independent review panel which was tasked by the Government to examine the 2014 family justice reforms. 

It’s the third review of the Family Court in 10 years.

The panel began its work in August 2018 and has visited 14 cities and towns, held 110 meetings and talked with hundreds of people, including parents, children, grandparents, judges, lawyers and other professionals about what needs to change.

Some of the critical issues raised included the delays in the process, the need for better participation of children in issues which affect them, an inflexible, one size fits all system and the lack of good and accessible information.

The final report, which will include recommendations for change, is due to be delivered to Justice Minister Andrew Little at the end of May.

Kerry Babbage, chief executive officer of the Mates advocacy service, said he was aware other men had similar experiences in the Family Court to that of the Taranaki father.

“A lot of the time they don’t have the support that women have around them,” Babbage said.

This includes emotional support and help from social agencies.

He said the financial toll a fight through the Family Court could have was also huge.

Hit 👍if you agree and leave a comment, if you have been through the same process or maybe worse ? .. Let your voice be heard ….



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Disgusting system, ruining families and childrens lives


I joined this from the Facebook pageS this is fascinating to me because I’ve been going through court with my ex partner and father of my children for the last 2 years.. I suffered terrible domestic violence, there was multiple police call outs from not only me but neighbours, over 10 PSO’s issued on him. Although in court he was discharged without conviction – we had gotten back together and I stupidly went back to him after this where we had another child. The violence continued. I have videos of him assaulting me, voice recordings, photos of my bruises all over my body, the police wouldn’t file new charges on him because they said I didn’t call at the time it happened and it had been 2 months later at this point when I had left with all the evidence I had on my phone. His father is also a police officer who works in the domestic violence area. They know the court system more than I do. My kids witnessed all the violence and have refused to see him but that has not changed anything. We are doing 50/50 atm on a interim parenting order. The domestic violence and… Read more »

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